Baby Blase

I started a list of things we need to pack for our upcoming trip to California. Which is in 2 weeks! F@#$! How did it become June already!? The list included our “kitchen knives”, “at least one of our cutting boards” and “veggie wash“.

OK, we’ll start with the easy one – Veggie Wash – we became addicted to this when Wholefoods started pushing it to big-veggie-purchasers in their store – we got a couple free bottles and have used it ever since. I’m not sure why I assumed that this was a product that wouldn’t be available in California. As if we are traveling to some far off land, where we would be without proper sanitation.

Cutting boards – this makes perfect sense to me. Have you ever tried to chop on broke-ass, plastic cutting boards that are a thousand years old, pock-marked and indented with years of use as a machete-throwing target? TERRIBLE!

Knives. I used to make fun of Marc for this. Since I’ve known the guy, he has carried around his own leather knife bag. And when we choose not to bring it with us on short trips, he always kicks himself when he is forced to chop with a sub-par substitute for his preferred blades. But, I have always been sensible – it’s just a knife! Come on, it’s not that bad. Now, get back to cooking our dinner! However, I have taken over the role of primary meal-preparer. And since we have a small human to provide for, the chopping has, at the very least, doubled. So, I am now, faced with the dilemma: recant my statements about Marc’s aforementioned silliness and pack up the knives for a little 2-month trip or deal with the possibility of chopping all of our veggies with what could be a butter knife.

This “packing list” is just a blip on the ridiculousness that has become my cooking. Last night, while preparing a simple leftover-chicken-pasta dish for the boy I added duck fat – yes, you read right – DUCK FAT – to finish the sauce. A good heaping teaspoon of it. First of all, I’m pretty sure DUCK FAT is not on our doctor’s list of healthy foods for your toddler to eat. Secondly, that stuff is expensive! So, what the hell am I doing wasting it on a child who clearly has no taste buds!

Or maybe, just maybe, we really are nurturing his love of food and he will never develop a taste for the evils that lurk in our grocery stores.

I suppose we will have to side with Anthony Bourdain on this and feed our kid as we would wish to be fed.

Listening: Phoenix